Ever seen Garden State? The scene where Zach Braff tries to swim?

I'll have to post regarding the status of my knees and my whole change of plan for training, but for now, I've discovered that so far swimming doesn't bother things too much, and the experience of Julie learning to swim is far too funny and pathetic not to share with the world. So enjoy.

I'm learning to swim. I've been wanted to do a tri and I know I'll have a hard time giving up running/biking time for swimming, especially at this early on stage where pretty much every stroke and breath is a struggle. Now when I say I'm learning to swim, I mean, like, square one, I have no idea how to do the whole breathing and swimming thing. Suffice it to say, it's a struggle. Just yesterday I managed to consistently swim about 25 yds without stopping and/or dying. That's like someone saying they managed to run a lap around the track without stopping. In terms of swimming, I'm the fat high school freshman who everyone has to wait for to finish the timed mile. My goal for the next week or two is to swim a hundred without stopping. In my mind, this is the equivalent of running a mile without stopping. And I'm at the point where I'm not sure how likely a possibility that is, given my current level of skill. I now really understand people that start running and have such a hard time getting into it. It's such a damn struggle in the beginning. And its very public. I mean, I have people coming up to me trying to give me tips cause I seriously look like I'm about to die. One guy told me I looked like I was "struggling." Thanks dude. What tipped you off? Me flailing and gasping for air or when I sunk to the bottom of the pool cause I inhaled a gallon of water? I have to leave any and all pride I have in my gym bag whenever I step foot in a lane. Even worse, it's like trying to learn to run during a track practice. Everyone knows what they are doing and they can damn well tell you are an outsider. Especially when you trip and fall every 20 meters or so.

In running you can breathe whenever you want. Tired? Take more breaths. Or maybe one long deep breath. Or just slow your breathing down a bit if you are getting too worked up. There are so many glorious options! Swimming is not that simple. And that would be because most of the time your face is underwater. I unfortunately sometimes get too excited to breathe and jump the gun. We all know where that leads. I also get really freaking tired because, as I mentioned before, I am the equivalent of a HS obese freshman. That means the whole three strokes and one breath things isn't yet a reality for me.

I also, from what observers have reported, tend to bring myself to a stop whenever I come up for air. Therefore, I can only imagine I must look like someone who is trying to drive stick for the first time, and every time they change gear they lurch then stall. Except the car also sinks a couple feet into the asphalt when it stalls. So i'm kinda like someone learning to drive stick over quicksand.

Apparently, despite having strong legs from being a runner, I don't know how to use them in the pool. I may be the first person ever who when given a kickboard and told to put her head in the water and kick across the pool, and managed to go backwards. I don't even think that is possible based on known physics of the universe, but I somehow managed it. Worse, once Lyndsey, in hysterics, pointed out this fact to me, I started laughing so hard that I once again slipped underwater and snorted/choked down half of the pool.

My obvious skills have earned me the nickname "Anchor" (tho to be fair, it was given to me by someone who hadn't actually observed my swimming skills, only heard of them through the stories and tales that have spread across San Diego). However, I was reminded that the Anchor on a relay team is usually the fastest, so I am instead going to take it as a compliment.

In conclusion, I have a long way to go. However, I always get pissed when people go for a run and then say it sucks and quit. So despite the ridicule, odd looks, and pity from observers, I will continue going to the pool and flailing about. Plus, I look damn good in that swim cap and goggles.